Got some teeth

So i know that everyone goes through this at one point in their lives, getting their wisdom teeth out. I dont know if im just a bigger wimp then everyone else or what but is it now THE MOST MISERABLE THING ON EARTH? I have never been so sick of icecream in my life. I cant eat anything and my face is swollen and i have two black eyes. aparently im theonly person on earth who has ever been so miserable getting their wisdom teeth out but somehow i feel like this is bullshit. Ok first of all, its like day 5, i still cant eat anything other then icecream plus ive gained back the 5 lbs i lost over the corse of two weeks. Yup people it takes two weeks to take 5 lbs off and four wisdom teeth to put it back on. FUCK YOU TEETH FUCK YOU. on top of that they gave me vicodin which i never understood why people took those for fun, i spent the first two days being so fucked up i didnt knwo my own name just sitting there not doing anything, its just like WOAH WOAH what is going on here. And the next day throwing up more then i have in my entire life. I legit threw up so much that i didnt have anything left in my body to throw up, and then i threw up more. IT WAS SOOOO PLEASENT. Today was the first day i felt like a real person enough to get up and go out. I finished/did my christmas shopping, overdrew my checking account (go me).
On the brightside my fabuluous friend who attends NYU is having just as miserable a night as i am. Not that her misery is great but she always sends me the most interesting text messages when shes drunk and angry. Right now shes telling me how she wants to punch a baby and shoot the dj at dollar beer night in the face. Sometimes im truely jelous of that girl. Shes the apitomy of a sorority girl and shes absolutely fabuluous. I dont get to see her often anymore because shes living at nyu but she was my neighbor for like 10 years, all her pictures look like a frat party that i wish i was invited to.
So now im trying to decide what im going to do new years eve. This being the first year i dont have a boyfriend in like 3 years i really want to tear it up, There is so much going on but all of its couples related. My friends who just got engaged "nick" and "jen" are throwing a party on and coworker boy wanted to come with however coworker boy is now offically with ugly girl so i dont think that offer is on the table anymore, plus im trying to get over that. Then theres beetlebop. Beetlebop is coming home from florida and he wants me to go to a party at his blind friends house. I hate his blind friend i think hes a prick and i htink his friends are creepy, not to mention that beetlebop is convinced that were going to have sex (we have not and will never have sex he doesnt seem to get that). Then my fabuluous friend from NYU is planning and hoping to go back to nyu intime to throw a new years ever party, thats always an option except that im working the night before and the night after newyears so it wouldnt make alot of sense to make the trip up there.For a change im the only one of my friends whose single which makes for one of two situations i eiher end up being odd man out or they try to set me up with whoever of their awkward male friends is single neither of which sound like a fun time. Its not like im in a rush to find someone, ivve been dating consistantly for five years. Im exausted, I just want to sit back relax and be the slut that everyone thinks i am. I did go throught my Slutty mc Slut slut phase when i was younger, but i dont think being slutty is such a bad thing. Sex is healthy its good for the soul, the attitude, and the waist line( aparently an orgasm burns calories). I definately have some great stories to tell at the dinner table if you know what i mean. When it comes to Sex, love and men Im pretty much your mothers worst nightmare.
Sometimes tho i really think that im the problem when it comes to relationships, It cant be every guy ive ever dated thats been wrong.Seriously tho i have pretty moderate standards. I didnt know it was too much to ask for a guy to have a decent relationship with his family, a job, a car, a license, not be into drugs, shower on a regular basis, pay for dates every so often but aparently it is. I used to hve much lower standards but ive since grown up and after my last relationship (textboy) ive decided that anyone who does not meet these minimum criteria will not make it past the front door. Last week i was talking to my boss about all my sexual exploits
its weird because hes 36 years older then me and a man but we relate alot, i guess he was alot like me before he met his wife (which first of all is normal for a guy) and i guess that gives me hope for the future because his wife pretty much the shit. Hes amazed that ive never done anything with a woman. Well ive never done anything with a woman and i plan to keep it that way.